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Small talk, and the questions that are not nosy

The standard opening questions, several of which would be intrusive in English and are not here.

a2Lesson 32 of 345 minWhere people get stuck

By the end of this lesson

  • Handle the standard opening questions
  • Answer personal questions without giving personal answers

The greeting that sounds like an interrogation

Mau ke mana? ‘Where are you going?’

You will be asked this by neighbours, security guards, shopkeepers and strangers, several times a day. It is not curiosity. It is the local equivalent of “morning, alright?”.

The answer is not your itinerary.

Jalan-jalan. ‘Just out and about.’
Ke sana. ‘Over there.’
Ke depan. ‘Just up the road.’

Any of these is complete and polite. Jalan-jalan is the doubled form you met in A1 and it exists almost entirely for this purpose.

The reverse, dari mana? ‘where have you come from’, works the same way.

The questions that are genuinely questions

Sudah menikah? ‘Are you married?’
Punya anak? ‘Do you have children?’
Umur berapa? ‘How old are you?’
Kerja di mana? ‘Where do you work?’
Sendirian? ‘On your own?’

In English several of these would be intrusive from a stranger. Here they are the standard way of placing someone socially, which determines how you should be addressed. They are asked without calculation and answered without offence.

Answering without answering

You are allowed to be vague.

Belum. ‘Not yet.’ Works for married, for children, for almost anything.
Rahasia. ‘That’s a secret.’ Said with a smile, entirely acceptable for age.
Kerja online. ‘I work online.’ Covers most modern jobs and ends the topic.

Weather and traffic

Panas ya. ‘Hot, isn’t it.’
Macet banget tadi. ‘Traffic was terrible.’
Hujan terus. ‘It keeps raining.’

Universal, safe, and always available. Macet in particular is the national conversational fallback.

Ending a conversation

Duluan ya. ‘I’ll go on ahead.’
Mari. Formal and slightly old-fashioned, but warm.
Mampir ya. From the invitations lesson, and remember it commits nobody.

What you’ll actually hear

What the book says: Selamat pagi, hendak pergi ke mana?
What you’ll hear: Mau ke mana, Mas?Jalan-jalan aja.

Words from this lesson

mau ke manawhere are you goingThe commonest greeting in the country. Not a real question.
dari manawhere have you come from
jalan-jalanjust wanderingThe universal non-answer.
sendirianalone